had an amazing day yest!!!! alex txt me at 720 which woke me up nd put 'fancy mcd? alexx'. well made me happy nd even tho i was propr tired i got up nd got ready nd was sorta walkn around the house just excited to meet up. they had to wait for ages for their bags, nd didnt get back in oxford until like half 9. dad drove me to his nd then we walkd back in to oxford. when he saw me he was walkn towards the car nd i could see him smiling nd it made me smile :-) i think if dad had have just drove off isnt of tryn to ask him about the holiday he would have maybe given me a hug.
he talked like non stop until we got to mc d. i bought him food nd he said thanks nd sorta put his arm on my hand. id pay for his food everday forever if he touchd my arm. know its mental bt it got me rock hard in like 1 second. when we were waitin i was sorta leaning on the counter to try nd press it down cos it was well obvious. it hadnt gone down fully nd we were walkn to sit in the window nd some girls came in from the year below who we sorta know nd they were like lookn at my cock nd then whispering to each other nd pointing :-/ went really red nd hot nd then it went down. argh. what a twat :-S
stayed in oxf for a bit, was well busy nd then we went nd sat by the river nd i wantd to ask why hes been weird nd why hed ignored me bt i got scared cos didnt wanna ruin the day nd piss him off :-S arghh. we talkd about random crap nd then more about his hols. he showed me some pics on his iphone nd it did look well nice. its weird how his dad goes with them even tho they split up ages ago. i asked him if he got any holiday sex nd he just laughd nd said yeah loads, bt did the wanking thing with his hand in my face lol. wish he actually would do that in my face. bt i think that means he didnt get any sex anyway lol.
went back to mine cos just got tired of walkn around, nd we watched peep show on 4od in my room. seen it a million times bt i didnt mind cos i know he loves it. i wanted to move closer to him but not be gay, nd so moved my leg to touch his leg. he didnt say anything so i left it there for a few mins, nd sorta touched his foot a bit with my foot. he didnt do anything back nd then a well funny bit was on peep show where super hans is smoking crack at a wedding, nd alex propr loves it bt he wasnt sayn anything or laughing nd i sat up nd omg he was propr asleep lol. pulln a weird face with his mouth open lol, bt he still looked fit :-P
i laid back down nd more on my side, got well close nd could feel the heat from his bod. got rock hard nd it was pushing on the side of his leg, i just closed my eyes for like a minute nd could feel my heart beating well fast nd sorta hear it beating in my mouth. was soooo hard thought i was gonna cum :-S he moved a tiny bit nd his arm moved off his leg nd touched my leg. omg i propr nearly spunked lol. wanted to kiss him so bad, nd was thinking what to do next, bt then felt all weird nd guilty nd felt bad liked id sorta raped him cos he was asleep nd i shouldnt have pushd my cock onto him :-S i just moved away nd sat up, turned peep show really low so it didnt wake him up. felt a bit bad, nd just paranoid in case he knew what i was doin. didnt sit next to him again, just sat on my chair with my feet on the bed, nd then just watched him for ages. not in a weird way lol.
my life as gay teenager growing up in oxford. ok, its hardly anne frank, really its just lots of random crap about me & my friends, and stuff about my fave hobby... wanking :-P
About Me
- josh!
- hey ppl, finally got a blog, how cool :-P every name with josh in it was gone, so named it after my favourite toy haha. not sure exactly what to write on this thing, so watch this space. well im josh, i live in summertown in oxford, anything else u wanna no send me a msg.
tipit
if u like my blog id like ur cash :-P hehe life is expensive ok? nd i promise to be a gd boy.
if u wanna give me cash, i well like amazon uk vouchers.
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31 comments:
So practically the first thing he does when he gets back from his holiday is spends the day with you - thats really sweet.
that is soooo cute. arghhh the way guys give mixed signals even though they don't realise it :S
hope you have many more days like this :)
Well glad Alexx is back to you.
It was another missed opportunity to rub his package, while he PRETENDED to be asleep like at Padstow.
You prolly don't wanna move too fast. Maybe he will call again today for a vid at his house, then he will pull it out??
;+p
Eric
Aw Josh, that's real sweet! Delighted to hear he's back, and you two are as sweet as ever!
Hugs
Adi
You do love this guy!
i dont think i could've resisted going for his bulge
What a lovely surprise!
I'm sure you were right to hold back; though it must have been an awful temptation. I suspect Alex doesn't quite feel sure of himself (though he obviously is attracted to you) and you don't want to frighten him off.
You are really a very nice boy, Josh; Alex is lucky to have you as his friend (lover)!
[The character box is "fulatio" - say it aloud!!]
You're doing great. Just use your instincts. There's sexual tension between you two you could cut with a knife so don't worry about that just keep that balance and keep going slow enough that you don't freak him out.
I think you know what you're doing.
Alex must have two clues that you are hot for him. When the time comes that some sexual activity may happen between the two of you, be prepared to defend your sexuality and let him know that homosexual sex is hot and natural; stoke his curiosity by saying that he doesn't know unless he tries it etc. It's not gay, but hot masculine sex. Also let him know that it is private and no one else's business. But you are taking the right approach by getting close to him first. But ultimately for sex to happen, it will take some risk. Why not get him to watch a gay twink sex vid with you? That might give him some ideas. bfn - Wayne :)
Josh, what you did to your friend was just WRONG.
He could have you arrested.
If someone is asleep they cannot consent to any sexual contact!!! Jesus.
Sounds so horny :) Wish I were your age again. Enjoy it!
petex, dont tar everyone with your own paranoid assumptions
if you do ever ask him about the time spent ignoring you,why not just say "so, everything's cool with us now?" and see how he interprets it. If he asks what you are talking about, then you could add that before his vacation he was acting a little distant. Whatver you do, keep it non-accusatorial (is that a word?) : )
Josh, please don't listen to some of these paranoid idiots who post comments here. There is nothing seriously wrong with what you did and it's nothing that millions of other teens, both gay and straight, have done.
I completely agree with OneNorth.
And i think Anonymous 19 July 2010 15:32, petex1991 and jatinder1 are tripping. Fully clothed frottage is barely even "sexual contact" much less "rape". You only touched his leg and he didn't even know anything about it. Talk about over-reacting.
If it was an adult doing that to a 16-year-old, that would have been a different matter but they're both the same age and Alex has dropped a LOT of hints over the years.
Josh, well done :)
You really have perfected your technique. You will make an amazing pedo when you are older. Well done!
Word verification: PMSLPEDO
To the anonymous troll at 19 July 2010 18:16:
uh... they're the same age.
Thanks Josh, this post made my day. I think you did the right thing by not pressing Alex too hard. About the weirdness I mean. I sincerely hope things go well for you two. At least you have some time now to just be friends again that in itself is to be treasured even if it leads to nothing else. Hugs. P.S. what a good friend you are, seriously.
... given the backlash some of these people are giving you, I can only surmise they've done things they're less than proud of in their own various histories. Your restraint is more than the vast majority of males in your age bracket, so yeah, take pride, don't feel bad about it, et cetera.
try a circle jerk. didnt you and jamie do that once or nearly?
very very common with str8 boys your age. prime yourselves with some bi porno?
Did you say you missed him while he was away? You were so bored!
wayner makes a lot of sense. Get past any guilt if you can. He needs to consent.
yeah, bi porn. 3 twinks and a chick.
word verification: everram
He's back; he wants to see you and you have a great day. See where it leads
big hugs
straight porn, then whip it out like jamie did that christmas
omg Joshie, you're just so much in love with Alex! it hurts just to read your post about your day with him, for you it must have been even worse... really don't know which advice to give... all the best for you anyway!
salomon
Josh!
I'm horrified at some of these hostile comments. Please take no notice; you've done nothing to be ashamed of. And a great deal less than you might have.
These sick people have their own problems, but that is no excuse to project them on to you.
It's good that you feel able to be so frank in your blog, even though it does expose you to these sad people.
All will be well, one day!
Wow !!
I'm always amazed at the number of freak out comments on these blogs. It would seem people such as 'Petex 1991' trawl everywhere searching opportunities to be utterly nasty and overbearing.
The expression 'Lil Dude' being somewhat patronising also indicates location USA, that land of religious extremism. At the end of the day, anyone who indulges heavily in such superstitious nonsense can be discounted - but they are dangerous people nonetheless.
You know if I'm Alex and I'm secretly reading this, i will smile and will secretly smell and kiss your forehead while you are asleep. You are very sweet and respectful.
Are you being ironic, kinkynik?
don't feel guilty, you had a bad idea, and didn't do it. not leting your hormons take controle just shows how much you like this guy.
and ps. not everyone in the the u.s. is "religious extremismest"
I remember haing a very similar experience lol. Your heart goes crazy doesnt it? I did the same as you though. What you should have done is tried not to be hard and just keep you leg there and pretend to be asleep. People always move when in there sleep.He might have got even closer and the next thing you know he could have been on top of you. Sweet post.
What's up? Have just read a few of your posts, so I'm pretty sure I'm up to speed, but haven't read all of them. Ignore the filthy shame mongering assholes dude. You're what? 16-17? It's perfectly natural, and acceptable, and you reacted in a completely normal, and sane way. Your poor mind must be going crazy with all your hormones surging through you, and no control. You're still growing up, and you in no way crossed any lines. I did some of the same things at that age. I'm 25 now. Whether straight or gay, guys, and girls that age do those things. It's pretty much a right of passage. It's a little more difficult for homosexual teens, though, I must admit. Just discovering, or only a few years before discovering that you're attracted to the same sex, and trying to work through all of the feelings, thoughts, and hormones can be a bitch. Especially with the stigma that society puts on homosexuals. Being attracted to someone, and wishing, hoping, wanting them to share a mutual attraction, and not be disgusted, and horrified that you are gay. It's a lot to deal with. You handled yourself very appropriately, there's nothing to be ashamed about, and your learning about yourself. Society is getting better, and one day I believe we'll evolve socially to the point individuals will not need to label themselves with there sexual identity, nor let it define them, but guys, girls, whatever will just find the person that's meant for them, fall in love, and it won't really register whether they're falling in love with someone of the opposite, or same sex. It'll just be, and that'll be that. Haha. Does that make sense? Cause it made sense in my head. :) hmu sometime if you ever want to chat.
btw, just wanted to write ya, no need to publish my comment, wanted you to get my e-mail. haha. honestly, hmu though. don't have to worry about me stalking you, lol. there's too much water between us. I'm in the US.
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